Someone once said that we were all created for success, but programmed for failure. And even if our lives don't end up being complete disasters, far too often we are willing to accept mediocrity, and that's bad enough. Too many people have set their sights on survival. They hope to get to the point where they are "comfortable", but they would gladly settle for just getting by and keeping up with the bills.
When we believe that we are supposed just "settle" for something - whatever that something might be - we end up missing what God has planned for us. We were all created to give glory to God and the last thing that He wants is for us to sell ourselves short and accept anything less than the best. Our lives should boldly proclaim what God can do for someone who believes in Him.
For those who remember the movie "The Matrix," there is a scene in which Neo, who has been "woken up" and brought into the real world, is being given some training. Because the people who had been in the Matrix were wired for direct computer access, they simply plugged Neo in and literally downloaded information, even something as complicated as Kung Fu, directly into his brain.
There are times when I think that it would be great to have a computer adapter in my head so that I could just download new beliefs and quickly, maybe even effortlessly, change my life. Can you imagine being able to change the course of your life, overcome all the bad memories and fears that have been holding you back, and do it all in a matter of seconds?
As great as that would be the technology just doesn't exist today. There are all kinds of things that can help us, from subliminal programming to self-hypnosis, but all of them take time. The only way that we can create rapid change is if we are willing to go through traumatic, highly emotional experiences. All of us have had those times in our lives when, both positive and negative, events dramatically affected us and changed our lives.
But let's assume that we want to change some specific belief that we have, one that has been holding us back from achieving the kind of results we want, or building the kind of life that we desire. For example, if the fear of failure has been keeping us from taking risks and we've been too scared to start that business we've always dreamed of, or to write that book we keep thinking about, what would we need to do so that we could overcome that fear?
Becoming Like Little Children
In Luke 18:17 Jesus says, "I tell you the truth, anyone who will not receive the kingdom of God like a little child will never enter it." Part of what He is talking about is salvation and being able to receive it with child-like, simple faith. But there is another important truth in this verse that has to do with being able to lay aside our current "truths", the beliefs that we have gathered throughout our lives, and simply accept what God says.
Children start life without any preconceptions about how it should be. But as adults we have our way of looking at things, and we judge everything based on what we have come to accept as truth in our minds. This truth, the set of beliefs that we hold on to, was developed when we were very young, and it determines every aspect of who we are and what we do. I like to say that a five year-old is running our lives, because much of what we believe about our world and ourselves was programmed into our minds before age five.
When we are born we are like blank slates. We are experiencing the world for the first time, so we don't have any previous beliefs about it that we have to overcome, we just start making one based on what we see, hear, and experience.
For example, we weren't born with any particular ideas about money or success, so when someone we respected, like a parent, taught us what to believe we simply accepted it. Now that we are older, and we realize that some of the things we learned as a child may not be correct, and we come to understand that they are actually keeping us from having what we want, we can't just start from scratch, we now have to overcome our old programming.
I don't know about you, but I have probably been guilty of telling my children to "grow up". And I most likely said it when I felt that they were being emotional, or irrational, about something. But the truth is that children don't have the capacity to control their feelings, or to stop and look at things logically and objectively.
The part of the brain that is responsible for doing that doesn't fully develop until we are about twenty years old. Up until that time we are driven by our emotions. And when it comes to forming memories, which become the beliefs and filters that we use to understand our world, the strength of those memories is determined by the emotions we experienced during, and shortly after, the original events.
As adults we have learned some level of self-control. That doesn't mean that we no longer experience emotions, the truth is that they are quietly running our lives behind the scenes, but we are not as susceptible to them as children. Because they are emotional, and not "logical", children are able to form stronger memories and easily create new beliefs.
As adults we make the mistake of assuming that we can appeal to our logical self, and that we can rationalize our way to a better life. But our subconscious mind, which is the little five year-old who is really in control of our lives, can't relate to all that heavy thinking. It needs to be treated like a child; it needs to know how we feel and not what we think.
Let's look at a concrete example and talk about money, because all of us have beliefs about it. We may think that all rich people are greedy, selfish, and evil, and we probably believe that because it was what our parents thought about them. And more important than what they thought and said on the subject was how they felt about it. If dad had felt cheated, or mistreated by the rich in some way, his anger was passed on to us, and now we associate negative feelings with people who have money, and perhaps even just with the idea of money in general.
We end up copying our parents because we learned about life from them. Some people will end up being very different from their parents because they don't have a healthy relationship with them, but most of us just end up thinking and acting in very similar ways, whether we want to or not.
With all the negative beliefs we have about the rich, or money, we end up unconsciously sabotaging ourselves whenever we start to get a little ahead, or if we start to get out of our financial comfort zone. And for most people that "financial comfort zone" is defined by what their parents believed and passed on to them.
Many Christians have the notion that money will corrupt them and turn them into someone who is evil, so they choose to remain poor, or at the very least to continue struggling with money so that they can be a good person. But they don't realize that this belief is based on the false idea that they have to earn righteousness by being a specific kind of person, and by doing certain things.
Our lives are controlled by what is in our hearts, by what we really believe in our subconscious minds. Being able to understand how things got that way still leaves us wondering what we can do to change. Is it possible for us to use this knowledge, and in one sense to become like children again, so that we can get past whatever is holding us back and write God's word, the truth that will make us free, in our hearts?
I think that the answer is in a little acronym that I use: W.I.E.R.D. I call it WIERD thinking, and yes I do know that I am misspelling the word weird, but I am trying to keep things in a specific order that can help us remember how we change our minds and thereby change our lives.
The W in WIERD Stands for Words
When we were small children, words didn't really have all that much meaning for us. It's only as we get older that we begin to assign meaning to them. As adults we tend to use words to express everything in our lives from what we think and feel to what we do.
Several years ago there was a big push in the company that I worked for to have every group develop their own mission statement. It was supposed to encapsulate what we did and help us focus our efforts. So management came up with some words and put them on large poster boards, and then hung them at strategic locations around our block of cubicles.
The only problem was that the statement consisted almost entirely of "management speak". They had things in there like "world-class", which is completely meaningless because no one really understands what that is. And if the thing that is supposed to help people do their jobs isn't easy to grasp, then it won't have much effect on them.
The other problem for me was something from Scott Adams' book, "The Dilbert Principle." The book has a section on mission statements with an example of one that was almost, word for word, identical to ours. So I found myself unable to take any of it very seriously.
As adults the words that we use are very important. Jesus told us, "For out of the overflow of the heart the mouth speaks." (Matthew 12:34b) Our words express what we believe and they tell us what is deep in our hearts. If we learn to listen to them, and even write them down and examine them, we can learn a lot about ourselves.
Joshua 1:8 says, "Do not let this Book of the Law depart from your mouth; meditate on it day and night, so that you may be careful to do everything written in it. Then you will be prosperous and successful." The Hebrew word that is translated as "meditate" can also mean to murmur, speak, and ponder. Jesus told us, "If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given you." (John 15:7)
The first step we can take is to become aware of the words and phrases we are using. What do we think, and say, when we talk about a particular topic? What do our words tell us about our beliefs? And what verses of scripture, what biblical truths could we use to change them?
Anything that we hear repeatedly, over a long period of time, will be more deeply ingrained in our thinking. These beliefs, the memories associated with a subject, become stronger as we think and talk about them. And we change them by applying the same process of repetition with God's word.
To meditate on the scriptures we spend time pondering and repeating the words in a particular passage. What we are doing is gradually replacing our old beliefs with new ones that are based on the Bible. The reason that Joshua was going to be successful and prosperous in all his ways, and why we will as well, is because God's word becomes so prevalent in our minds that we begin to change our thoughts and feelings. And as those thoughts and feelings change, we also change our actions. Because our actions are based on truth, and backed by faith in God, our success is guaranteed.
When selecting words for the phrases that will help us reprogram our minds, it's important to use positive, present tense language that we can believe, and to include an expression of gratitude. We should use short statements that say what we want, rather than what we don't want, and that are spoken in faith.
For example if we say, "God, I'm thankful that you have helped me, and that You always help me. I choose to be at my optimum weight, to eat healthy nutritious foods, and to exercise daily. I choose to feel great." That statement, or affirmation, is true and easy for us to accept and believe, and it is based on faith. Not to mention that it helps us see ourselves in a much more positive light, than saying, "I'm so fat! I hate myself!"
As we repeat the positive phrase, and use the other elements that I will be talking about in a minute, we begin to change how we see ourselves. Our focus shifts away from what we currently have to what is possible for us. When that happens we develop hope, which becomes the basis of our faith, and we begin to change not only how we think but also what we do.
The I in WIERD Stands for Images
There's an old saying that a picture paints a thousand words. And when it comes to reprogramming our minds the use of images is very important.
Have you ever gotten so caught up in a movie that you felt like you were actually there? The main reason is that the images have a powerful impact on our mind. The dialog may be powerful, but it is the images that really get us. An actor saying that he is sad doesn't have the same impact as actually seeing him cry.
Researchers have found that a vividly imagined event is treated the same way in our minds as a real one. Which is part of the reason that some people develop false memories. They picture something happening, and that image gets stored in their brains just like a normal memory. As far as their brains are concerned, the simulated, or imaginary event appears to be real.
When Neo was plugged into the computer and learned Kung Fu, part of that programming was pictures of the movements, the kicks and punches that he needed to do. The computer wasn't downloading a bunch of words and instructions; it was actually placing the images in his mind. They then formed memories and, viola! He was a master at martial arts.
An experiment was done at the University of Chicago in which a group of basketball players was tested to see how well they did when shooting from the foul line. Once each person's skill and accuracy was determined, they then divided the participants into three groups. The first group was told to do nothing, don't practice their foul shots at all. The second group was told to practice the shot each day, and the third group was told to visualize, simply practice the shot in their mind, for the length of the experiment, which was thirty days.
Then the groups were tested to see if there had been any improvement. As was expected, the first group, which had not practiced, showed no improvement. The second group improved by 24%, which was reasonable when we consider that they practiced the shot for thirty days. What surprised the researchers was that the third group, the one that had only visualized making foul shots, improved by 23%, even though they hadn't touched a basketball in thirty days.
What this shows us is that visualization, imagining an experience, is almost as powerful as actually doing it. The real power, and the opportunity to make major changes in our lives, will come when we combine images with the right words and the other parts of WIERD thinking.
If we use money as an example, it would be important for us to see ourselves with it. We would want to imagine having the kind of income we desire, as well as seeing ourselves enjoying having more than enough to meet our needs. We should also spend time picturing ourselves as the kind of person who honors God, both in our attitude toward, and our use of, money. We have to remember that we are replacing the negative images that are in our minds with positive ones so that we reprogram the way that we think about things like money.
No matter what it is that we want to change, we should see ourselves doing the things that are consistent with the new belief. Our current mindset was created by the words and images, as well as what we experienced while we were growing up. When we vividly imagine being a different kind of person, or doing things we've never done before, we create memories that are just as real to our minds as our past experiences. The more we do that, the stronger our new beliefs will become.
When I say that the images need to be vivid, what I mean is that they should include as many of our senses as possible. We should imagine what we will see, feel, hear, and even smell. The imaginary experiences need to be as close to the real thing as we can make them. And just like our words should be present tense, expressing things as already being how we want them, the scenes and mental movies that we create should have us being, doing, and having what we want.
For how visualization, the use of imagery, can help us with our faith, please see my article entitled: Using Our Faith - The Power of Visualization.
The E in WIERD Stands for Emotion
I mentioned earlier that children think emotionally, rather than rationally, and that our subconscious minds are like little children. In that part of our minds we are still five year-olds, not in terms of the memories that are there, but because of the beliefs that were formed long ago.
When we want to change things, it's natural that we will experience some resistance. That little boy or girl who is hiding in our unconscious minds doesn't like change. So when some adult, even if it's just the grown-up version of us, comes along with some new ideas, our inner child doesn't like it. The usual reaction is to begin to feel anxious, maybe even afraid.
Just think about the last time you did something was unfamiliar. How did you feel? Were you uncomfortable? I think it's safe to assume that the "peaceful, easy feeling" was gone and a tense and uneasy one replaced it. For some people it may have gone way beyond a few butterflies to a feeling of panic.
What we experience when we get out of our comfort zones is simply a reaction caused by our brains. Most people really like routine, and for things to stay the way they are. So when something comes along that shakes things up, it can begin to feel like an attack. And that is what happens when we confront our old beliefs with new ones. The little boy or girl inside us begins to get scared that their familiar world is about to be torn apart, and the promise of a new and better world is rejected.
If we try to replace the truths that we base our lives on with a few new phrases and images, the emotional resistance we experience will cancel them out. Which is one reason why a lot of people have given up on the idea of affirmations. They tried saying positive things to themselves, things that were logical and rational, but it just didn't work. They may have even tried visualization, but they got the same disappointing result, nothing changed. They came to the conclusion that this stuff doesn't work.
The techniques they were using were actually not the problem. The problem was caused because they were missing an important ingredient, emotion. If we don't associate strong, positive emotions with our words and images we end up losing the battle. Our subconscious minds simply won't accept the new thoughts.
Have you ever tried to use logic on a five year-old? Well it's the same basic problem that arises when we try to reason with our subconscious minds. We keep trying to convince it that these new concepts really are beneficial, but all it knows is that this means change, and that's scary. The fear overrides the new beliefs and protects the old ones.
The emotions created by this mental resistance, the child inside our mind refusing to let go, will actually reaffirm our current worldview and reject the new one. We can begin to feel like things just get worse and that our lives will never change. But the truth is that we were just missing a key ingredient. The methods work fine when we have all of the elements of WIERD thinking working together.
When choosing the vivid, or sensory rich (using all our senses) images that we want to use, not only should we be looking for the physical feelings, for example imagining the warm sunshine on a beautiful day as we relax on the deck of our new home, but the emotional ones. We should imagine the feeling of joy, satisfaction, gratitude that we will experience.
The memories that we have all have all of these components. We remember the sights, sounds, and smells as well as the excitement, joy, and love that we felt at the time. And because our brains activate those memories whenever we come into similar situations, it's important that we reprogram our minds with all of those elements. The new beliefs should be formed with "memories" that are just as real as the ones that make up our current ones.
The R in WIERD Stands for Repetition
"If I've told you once, I've told you a thousand times..." How many times have you heard that one?
But no matter what it is that we are learning, a new skill or a new belief, repetition is an important part of taking something new and making it a part of who we are. They say that the average first grader needs to hear something thirty-two times before they will remember it. And it probably isn't all that much better for adults.
When we are changing things that have been with us all of our lives, we can't expect that we can erase years and decades worth of programming with a five-minute session. It's just not possible.
I heard about an experiment that was done at NASA. The researchers were trying to find out how the human brain reacts to being disoriented, like floating around in space, for a long period of time. What they decided to do was to have a group of volunteers where goggles that turned everything upside down. These people wore the goggles twenty-four hours a day.
What happened surprised the scientists. After the participants had been wearing the goggles for almost a month, their brains flipped what was coming in through their eyes, and they all started seeing the world right side up again. What they discovered was that our brain can rewire itself, even something as fundamental as how the signals from our eyes are interpreted, if we will maintain the new way of seeing things consistently over a long enough period of time.
And when I say, "Long enough," what we have to realize from the experiment is that we're talking about a matter of weeks, and not years, to make even substantial changes. But being consistent and constantly reinforcing the new programming is essential.
If we can put that in perspective for a moment, let's come back to our current thoughts about money. These beliefs are the result of the memories that we have starting in early childhood and going on throughout our lives up until today. But the times we thought, or talked about money, are moments that occurred here and there over a lifetime.
When I first started wearing a seat belt in the car it was uncomfortable and I had to make a conscious decision to put it on every time that I got in the car. But after doing it over and over again, it became a habit. Now it feels strange if I don't put it on.
It's the same thing with our beliefs, because they are nothing more than habitual ways of thinking. In order to change them all we have to do is create enough new memories, with words, images and emotions, to counteract the old ones. By immersing ourselves in the new way of thinking, and being consistent about confronting the old thoughts, we can quickly teach ourselves a new habit, we can reprogram our minds.
Most people find that early in the day and right before bed are the most effective times to repeat the phrases, or affirmations, and spend time, usually just five or ten minutes, visualizing and emotionalizing how they want to see themselves. It's not a lot of time, but it does need to be a time of concentrated, focused, effort on the new beliefs.
And then all they do is pay attention during the day. Anytime they catch themselves reverting to their old thoughts, they do what I did with my seat belt; they make a conscious decision to practice the new way of thinking. Some people even go as far as wearing a rubber band on their wrist and snapping themselves with it whenever they notice that they have fallen into their old thinking habits.
Whatever works best for you, it's worth it. In order to start having different things in our lives we have to start thinking different thoughts. The benefit to us is that we will have a clearer vision of what we want to become, our faith will get stronger, and we will see God do more in our lives. The end result will be an incredible life that will bring glory to God, and that will be a blessing for us, and for everyone around us.
All that it takes to get it started is a decision, and then some follow-through. Which brings me to the next part of WIERD thinking.
The D in WIERD Stands for Discipline
Our memories don't consist of just words, pictures, and emotions; they were experiences. We listened to, or took part in conversations, we watched movies and TV shows, and we did things that helped us form, and affirm, our beliefs. And when we want to change them, we need to do the same thing.
I'm a writer, so one of the things that I do is to affirm that I love to write, I see myself writing, and even imagine feeling joy when I write. But another key ingredient that completes the picture is actually taking time and writing.
I meet people occasionally who tell me that they would like to be a writer. Some of them even have ideas that they have been toying with for years, but they haven't actually written anything. And it's not that they haven't written their book, they haven't written anything. They don't keep a journal, they don't spend anytime, let alone a regular amount of time each day or week, doing any writing.
Take a moment and think about something that you do well. It doesn't matter what it is, whether it's a sport, your job, or a hobby. How did you get good at it?
I'm willing to bet that you spent time actually doing whatever it was. If you're good at basketball, you probably spent time reading about it (words), watching it (images), enjoying it (emotions), as often as you could (repetition), and you probably played a few, maybe even a lot, of games. In other words you did it. You didn't just think about it, you took action and physically got involved with it.
Now the D in WIERD thinking involved two different aspects. The one is the discipline to create the words, images, emotions, and do the repetitions needed to make the changes that you want to make in your beliefs. It's the discipline to do the work of creating all the other four elements.
But there is another aspect that goes beyond just visualizing it, and that is doing something, anything, that supports the new belief. If you are changing your old belief about money, what action can you take today that will help support that change?
For example, if you want to become a millionaire, you would start to tell yourself that you are one, see yourself living the life of one and experiencing the emotions, the joy and gratitude of having God's blessings, and you go through this exercise repeatedly every single day. But is there something that you could do today that a millionaire would do?
Before you say, "A millionaire would go out and buy a Mercedes..." stop for minute. And if you can afford to buy the book, "The Millionaire Mind" by Thomas J. Stanley, or you can borrow it from your local library, do that first and read about what real millionaires do. Because the idea that rich people just sit around and think about ways to spend lots of money is false.
If you have ever seen shows like "Lifestyles of the rich and famous," you've gotten in inaccurate picture of how the truly wealthy live. Because what you see in shows like that is how they live AFTER they have become wealthy. You rarely, if ever, get a chance to see what they went through to get to that point.
Those who really are rich have used their minds and their talents to build their wealth. They spent time learning how to invest their money, not on how to spend it. So if you want to do something today that a millionaire would do, go to the library and get a book on investing in the stock market, or real estate. Take some time to learn about assets and how to build them.
People don't end up broke all their lives because they don't make enough money. They end up broke because they spend all, maybe even a little more, of what they make. The ones who become wealthy do it because they learn how to use money to create more. In the Bible the parable of the talents in Matthew 25 teaches us that being faithful with money means to properly use it so that it multiplies.
You may not have more than a couple dollars left in your bank account, but you can start learning how to think like a millionaire today, and all you need is a library card, and that won't cost you a penny.
In Conclusion
Our worldview was formed early in our lives, and we've been reaffirming it ever since. It is these beliefs that we cling to that shape our lives. They can either hold us back, keeping us stuck in our usual ruts, or we can change them and create a life built on truth and faith that will astound everyone, including us.
God can do so much more in our lives than we can imagine, but we have to reprogram our minds so that we can take hold of all that He has for us. The process is simple; just a little WIERD thinking is all that it will take.
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